The Sun-Herald

The Tribal Mind: Great Aussie crazes, from the VCR to the Rudd

By David Dale
This is the notion we're exploring today: John Howard is Channel Nine, Kevin Rudd is Channel Seven. Or John Howard is cinema, Kevin Rudd is DVD. And the result of the election will depend on whether, come November, Australia is going through a "sit-forward'' phase or a "sit-back'' phase.

Consider this observation: "Sometimes people don't want to be challenged. They just want to have a passive, entertaining viewing experience. People like escapism." That was said last week by Melissa Grego, managing editor of the US industry magazine TelevisionWeek, in an attempt to explain the cheerful simplicity of many of the programs planned by the US TV networks for next season.

I'm not sure if that's an accurate analysis of the mood of America (bad news for Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama if it is). But I'm quite sure it's not a description of Australia's mood right now.

We are world famous as a nation of early adopters. Every five years or so, we embrace a new way of entertaining ourselves. Future historians will look back on the period from the mid 70s to the mid noughties and see this pattern: colour television, the VCR, the CD, the mobile phone, the games box, the DVD, the iPod, the Rudd. The question is whether our enthusiasm for the last fad on the list, as displayed in last week's opinion polls, will last long enough to translate into votes. Because we're a moody lot.

Media analysts make a distinction between "sit-back technology'' (such as movies and television), in which we let the story wash over us, and "sit-forward technology'' (such as computers and video games) which requires active engagment. The advent of the DVD allowed movies to become sit-forward, because we could change the experience with the bonus features. And shows such as Big Brother, Australian Idol and Dancing With The Stars let us actively engage with television, manipulating the story with a phone call.

Australia's current preference for Channel Seven, which offers novelty, over Channel Nine, which offers "we know what's best for you", suggests that the nation is in sit-forward mode. If an election were held now, we'd vote for surprise and risk rather than predictability and comfort.

But Nine has just won its first week of the year (by one tenth of a percentage point). Does this signal the beginning of a national mood change?

Past experience suggests Australians take about six months to follow US trends. You can expect the prime minister to hold off the election date till as late as possible this year. He'll be watching the ratings, tracking the rise of Nine and the decline of Seven, waiting for clear evidence that we have settled back onto the sofa of life. Then he'll pounce.

What do you reckon?

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 12:06 PM
• Comments (35)

Culture: Depp impact

It's half as funny as its predecessor, and twice as long as it needs to be, which means the multiplexes can't show it as often as they'd like, but that didn't stop Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End from selling $12.07 million worth of tickets at the weekend.

That's Australia's best movie opening since Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire in 2005. Pirates 2 opened with $11.2m and went on to make $38 m, and the original Pirates opened with $5.2m and made $25m.

And in case you found Pirates 3 too short, here's a tip: go and see it again and stay in the cinema till the end of the credits, when you will glimpse Elizabeth Swann and Will Turner ten years after the story of the movie.

We welcome your comments

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 12:08 AM
• Comments (4)

WHO WE ARE: We are moderately fond of a sunburnt country

A column about Australia by David Dale, published in The Sun-Herald 27/5/07
An Australian who goes overseas and pokes poop at his homeland is never popular. So I'm confessing my sin now before somebody finds me out and dobs me in to the UnAustralian Values Commission. And I'm offering this defence: I wasn't knocking Australia, I was knocking Tourism Australia.

Here's what happened: a few weeks ago a travel magazine in Singapore asked me to write an article about the Australian character, apparently because I had produced a book called Who We Are: A snapshot of Australia today. Singapore is one of our fastest-growing sources of tourists (22,000 a month), so this was quite a responsibility. But the more I thought about it, the more I grew annoyed about the way this country has been promoted overseas this year.

So this was how I started the article: "The tourism authorities will kill me for saying this, but I'm not at all comfortable with their latest international advertising campaign, built around the phrase 'So where the bloody hell are you?'

"They're pleased with the way the ad agency included The Great Australian Expletive in a slogan, and with all the free publicity this has generated. My concern is not with the alleged rudeness of the word. It's with the attitude implied in the statement. There's an arrogance there, a sense of entitlement, that is not characteristic of the Australia I know and like.

"The quality I admire most in my compatriots is modesty. We know we have exported some pretty good actors, directors, cricketers, swimmers, musicians and models. And we know we have some pretty spectacular scenery, even if it's too widely separated for comfort (try seeing the Barrier Reef, Uluru, Monkey Mia and the Tasmanian wilderness in one week and you'll need a holiday when you get home). But we still don't think of ourselves as particularly worth a journey.

"The statistic that five million people visit us every year comes as a surprise to most Australians. A more realistic slogan to represent our attitude to international tourism would be 'Why the bloody hell would you bother?'.

"The tone of the campaign is alien to my sense of the Australian character -- aggressive and aggrieved rather than calm and cheerful (an approach implied by the expression 'she'll be right, mate')."

My article went on to discuss a theory of John Carroll, Professor of Sociology at Melbourne's La Trobe University, that in their relaxed approach to life Australians resemble their native animals, according to. "Peoples, like individuals, take flight into ideology, dogmatism and ranting when they feel under inner threat," Carroll said in the Deakin lecture of 2001. "It is a leading mark of Australia as a political culture to have always and without exception been sceptical of idealism, hostile to extremists, innately drawn to the moderate, the sensible, the unassuming. It points to a fundamental security of being.

"Special warmth has grown for the kangaroo, koala, platypus, and echidna that is more than the cuddly toy sort. The marsupials set a tone, in their way of being. In part it is their lack of aggression, except when cornered. The quiet way they go about negotiating their habitat has affinity with the way the people respond to bureaucratic controls. The kookaburra reminds humans, prone to taking themselves seriously, that they are easy to laugh at."

Of course, having rubbished the slogan in another country, I'm obligated to come up with a better idea. Can you help? If you can think of a more suitable way to sell us to the world, share it here ...

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in Who We Are at 01:49 PM
• Comments (53)

The ratings race: Week 21

This blog is now a heritage item -- worth studying but no longer current. To join the latest discussion on media and popular culture, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.
Updated 10 am Sunday May 27
Let down by Rugby Union, Channel Seven attracted 25.1 per cent of the prime time audience on Saturday night. Buoyed up by silly home videos, Channel Nine attracted 25.8 per cent. Result: Nine has won its first week of the year. Its average over the whole week was 28.3 per cent, while Seven's was 28.2 (Ten 21.2, ABC 16.4, SBS 5.9). This column will do a full analysis when we start the new week's blog later today.

What Australia watched, Saturday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,295,000 346,000 350,000 239,000 134,000 227,000
2 FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS Nine 1,182,000 306,000 345,000 245,000 160,000 124,000
3 NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,081,000 303,000 325,000 198,000 132,000 122,000
4 THE GREAT OUTDOORS Seven 937,000 279,000 231,000 180,000 111,000 136,000
5 TEN NEWS AT FIVE SAT Ten 880,000 166,000 267,000 166,000 144,000 136,000
6 PRIMEVAL Nine 853,000 237,000 209,000 202,000 119,000 86,000
8 Movie: DAREDEVIL Nine 770,000 191,000 176,000 193,000 111,000 99,000
9 SATURDAY NIGHT AFL Ten 710,000 M384,000 B102,000 A112,000 P111,000
11 THE BILL ABC 680,000 189,000 182,000 143,000 74,000 92,000
12 SATURDAY AFTERNOON AFL Ten 674,000 63,000 186,000 69,000 145,000 212,000
17 TOP GEAR RPT SBS 513,000 146,000 169,000 87,000 60,000 51,000
19 SEVEN'S R.U: AUS V WALES Seven 480,000 252,000 34,000 144,000 15,000 34,000
21 THE INSPECTOR LYNLEY MYSTERIES Seven 450,000 M212,000 A115,000 P123,000
23 GREAT COMEDY CLASSICS Seven 369,000 M250,000 A119,000
26 IRON CHEF SBS 326,000 110,000 88,000 56,000 32,000 41,000
33 Movie: SOMERSAULT SBS 241,000 78,000 68,000 41,000 25,000 30,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

After 6/7ths of the week, the prime time audience shares stand thus: Nine 28.6 per cent, Seven 28.6 per cent, Ten 20.8, ABC 16.4, SBS 5.6. If you'd care to predict whether this will be Nine's first winning week of the year, based on tonight's lineup (Seven has Rugby Union, Nine has a movie called Daredevil), register your prediction below.
What Australia watched, Friday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,369,000 356,000 346,000 269,000 177,000 221,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,312,000 368,000 311,000 250,000 168,000 215,000
3 NINE NEWS Nine 1,154,000 345,000 309,000 249,000 155,000 96,000
4 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,137,000 278,000 390,000 247,000 134,000 88,000
5 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,122,000 354,000 266,000 201,000 123,000 178,000
6 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,073,000 246,000 356,000 228,000 132,000 112,000
10 BIG BROTHER Ten 897,000 196,000 263,000 216,000 113,000 109,000
18 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 9: FREMANTLE V ST. KILDA Seven 708,000 30,000 317,000 18,000 122,000 220,000
20 NINE'S LIVE FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 602,000 361,000 240,000
22 JERICHO Ten 509,000 99,000 176,000 117,000 74,000 44,000
30 NINE'S FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 399,000 275,000 124,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am Friday May 25
Lost seems to have lost relatively few viewers in its move to 9.30pm in Sydney and Brisbane, and Heroes seems to be in good shape after its move to Thursdays in those cities. A clearer picture will emerge in the weekly ratings which will be reported here on Sunday morning, but readers with spare time and a mathematical bent could check those impressions by adding figures from the two nights and comparing with last week. All the data you need is at www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

Nine and Seven gained equal shares of the prime time audience last night, which means that the averages for the week so far stand at Nine 28.8 per cent, Seven 28.5, Ten 20.9, ABC 16.4, and SBS 5.3. Much will depend on how Seven goes with its AFL tonight and its movies tomorrow night.

And following questions from readers of this column, Seven has helpfully clarified its schedule from now on:
Wednesdays
Sydney and Brisbane - Air Crash Investigations and Prison Break
Melbourne Adelaide and Perth - Heroes and Prison Break
Thursday
Sydney and Brisbane - Heroes and Lost and Amazing Race
Melbourne Adelaide and Perth - Lost and Amazing Race and Family Guy

Air Crash Investigations is apparently not good enough to be shown in the AFL states.

What Australian watched, Thursday
Description Five City Metro Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS (7) 1,461,000 391,000 365,000 303,000 186,000 216,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT (7) 1,453,000 395,000 366,000 299,000 173,000 221,000
3 RPA WHERE ARE THEY NOW? (9) 1,372,000 406,000 427,000 207,000 175,000 157,000
4 MY NAME IS EARL (7} 1,306,000 331,000 411,000 268,000 127,000 169,000
5 HOME AND AWAY (7) 1,246,000 364,000 319,000 276,000 116,000 171,000
6 NINE NEWS (9) 1,212,000 295,000 428,000 241,000 135,000 113,000
7 HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER (7) 1,211,000 318,000 385,000 247,000 106,000 154,000
8 GETAWAY (9) 1,168,000 350,000 372,000 219,000 102,000 125,000
9 A CURRENT AFFAIR (9) 1,160,000 263,000 401,000 242,000 129,000 125,000
11 LOST (7) 1,059,000 235,000 399,000 174,000 122,000 127,000
12 LAW AND ORDER: SVU (10) 1,044,000 291,000 316,000 175,000 110,000 152,000
14 LAW & ORDER: CRIMINAL INTENT (10) 1,007,000 328,000 261,000 183,000 104,000 130,000
15 BIG BROTHER (10) 919,000 232,000 238,000 206,000 124,000 119,000
17 THE FOOTY SHOW (9) 893,000 204,000 356,000 113,000 130,000 90,000
24 THE AMAZING RACE: ALL STARS (7) 757,000 159,000 307,000 100,000 100,000 91,000
27 HEROES Network (7) 574,000 S 312,000 B 263,000
(OzTAM preliminary figures, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am Thursday May 24
Channels Seven and Ten did a preemptive buckle in the face of Nine's rugby league last night, but the ABC stood firm, and was vindicated with figures for The Chaser that were barely down on the previous week. The ABC assumed that the kind of viewers who love to sit through hours of biffo (including pre and post match analysis) are different from the kind of viewers who like satire.

By offering an alternative instead of running away, the ABC got a healthy 17 per cent of the prime time audience last night. Nine won the night, of course, and over the week so far, the averages stand at Nine 28.9 per cent, Seven 28.4, Ten 20.8, ABC 16.4, SBS 5.5. Nine could win its first week of the year.

Here's a sampling of the way the audience fragmented last night:

What Australia watched, Wednesday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 STATE OF ORIGIN RUGBY LEAGUE MATCH Nine 1,982,000 831,000 358,000 725,000 38,000 30,000
2 STATE OF ORIGIN POST MATCH DISCUSSION Nine 1,851,000 762,000 392,000 667,000 17,000 13,000
3 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,512,000 404,000 391,000 295,000 184,000 238,000
4 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,463,000 413,000 385,000 281,000 169,000 214,000
5 STATE OF ORIGIN PRE MATCH Nine 1,402,000 575,000 332,000 495,000
6 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,343,000 357,000 434,000 275,000 143,000 134,000
7 NINE NEWS Nine 1,326,000 347,000 422,000 287,000 153,000 116,000
8 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING ABC 1,279,000 342,000 474,000 161,000 147,000 155,000
9 TEMPTATION Nine 1,269,000 319,000 429,000 262,000 120,000 139,000
10 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,267,000 372,000 341,000 253,000 127,000 174,000
11 SPICKS AND SPECKS ABC 1,207,000 304,000 431,000 163,000 168,000 142,000
12 LAST CHANCE LEARNERS Seven 1,112,000 258,000 421,000 172,000 106,000 155,000
15 HOUSE RPT Ten 991,000 215,000 351,000 143,000 123,000 159,000
24 MEDIUM RPT Ten 749,000 163,000 268,000 123,000 91,000 103,000
25 HEROES Seven 624,000 M372,000 A106,000 P146,000
52 M-FINDING NEVERLAND Seven 249,000 S161,000 B88,000
53 COLD CASE -RPT Nine 249,000 A124,000 P125,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

What Australia watched, Tuesday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,558,000 391,000 432,000 278,000 189,000 268,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,428,000 363,000 390,000 241,000 183,000 251,000
3 IT TAKES TWO Seven 1,411,000 422,000 443,000 210,000 144,000 192,000
4 NCIS Ten 1,403,000 343,000 421,000 268,000 194,000 178,000
5 ALL SAINTS Seven 1,278,000 363,000 441,000 151,000 151,000 172,000
6 NINE NEWS Nine 1,270,000 340,000 397,000 257,000 159,000 117,000
7 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,255,000 324,000 413,000 251,000 142,000 124,000
8 20 TO 1 -RPT Nine 1,222,000 321,000 385,000 213,000 155,000 149,000
9 BIG BROTHER Ten 1,215,000 304,000 331,000 262,000 159,000 159,000
10 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,181,000 335,000 322,000 199,000 136,000 190,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am Tuesday May 22
The prayers of the faithful were answered on Monday night and Andrew Denton's expose of religious humbuggery, God On My Side, drew only 942,000 viewers in the mainland capitals, beaten by the morally impeccable Brothers and Sisters with 990,000. Channel Seven won the night, and the prime time audience shares for the week so far stand at Seven 29.1 per cent, Nine 27.3, Ten 19.6, ABC 17.3 and SBS 6.8. Eddie McGuire had better hurry back from LA to fix things.

What Australia watched, Monday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,615,000 480,000 414,000 258,000 201,000 262,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,526,000 453,000 410,000 246,000 192,000 224,000
3 DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Seven 1,444,000 453,000 453,000 210,000 155,000 172,000
4 NINE NEWS Nine 1,387,000 364,000 473,000 286,000 141,000 124,000
5 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,333,000 355,000 467,000 256,000 125,000 131,000
6 THE RICH LIST Seven 1,291,000 355,000 411,000 189,000 165,000 171,000
7 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,274,000 409,000 332,000 229,000 141,000 164,000
8 1 VS 100 Nine 1,245,000 367,000 405,000 193,000 137,000 142,000
9 TEMPTATION Nine 1,150,000 325,000 381,000 187,000 123,000 135,000
10 BIG BROTHER LIVE NOMINATION Ten 1,118,000 287,000 308,000 254,000 142,000 127,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am, Monday May 21
Pay television had a huge hit (by its standards) on Monday night with a biopic about Graham Kennedy. Despite being long and dark (both literally and figuratively), The King on TV1 attracted 176,900 viewers across the mainland capitals. Here's how the rest of the viewing population spent the night ...

What Australia watched, Sunday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 60 MINUTES Nine 1,662,000 432,000 549,000 299,000 175,000 208,000
2 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,661,000 354,000 491,000 343,000 200,000 273,000
3 WHERE ARE THEY NOW Seven 1,538,000 415,000 491,000 268,000 174,000 190,000
4 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,420,000 421,000 467,000 209,000 138,000 185,000
5 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,399,000 425,000 453,000 232,000 158,000 131,000
6 CSI: -RPT Nine 1,314,000 394,000 397,000 219,000 147,000 157,000
7 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,178,000 329,000 357,000 190,000 145,000 157,000
8 CSI: MIAMI -RPT Nine 1,156,000 368,000 356,000 172,000 137,000 123,000
9 BIG BROTHER LIVE EVICTION Ten 1,141,000 319,000 316,000 238,000 136,000 132,000
10 THE LOST TRIBES Nine 1,075,000 269,000 331,000 207,000 123,000 146,000
11 ABC NEWS-SUN ABC 1,054,000 314,000 337,000 166,000 111,000 126,000
12 BIG BROTHER SUN Ten 971,000 243,000 259,000 212,000 126,000 130,000
13 ROBIN HOOD ABC 914,000 266,000 297,000 164,000 101,000 85,000
14 ROVE Ten 902,000 213,000 286,000 166,000 131,000 106,000
15 LIFE ON MARS ABC 855,000 250,000 282,000 144,000 77,000 103,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am Sunday May 20
By coincidence, the week when Channel Nine got its worst ratings of the year was the week in which Eddie McGuire boned himself as Chief Executive, and the week in which Nine announced that he would be replaced by nobody -- presumably because his job had been unnecessary all along. The prime time audience shares for last week were: Seven 30.2 per cent, Nine 25.6, Ten 20.9, ABC 16.9. SBS 6.6.

Eddie should have waited a few days before making his announcement, so that Nine would have looked in better shape. It could come close to winning this week because of the State of Origin rugby league match on Wednesday night. Seven and Ten assume the game will attract so many male viewers in Sydney and Brisbane that there's no point even trying to compete. Seven has moved its sci-fi thriller Heroes to Thursday night and replaced it with a movie aimed at women and children (Finding Neverland). Ten is showing a repeat of House, just when it was starting to recover from Ten's last decision to show repeats, over Easter.

The ABC is bravely countering the State of Origin with new episodes of Spicks and Specks and The Chaser's War On Everything, secure in the knowledge that the kind of males who watch those shows are too intelligent to be distracted by commercial biffo.

SBS had its biggest audience share in many weeks, scoring with the Eurovision Song Contest final (436,000), South Park (457,000), Top Gear (469,000) and Mythbusters (715,000). Its Wednesday lineup of Dateline (175,000 last week) and World News Australia Late (184,000) is unlikely to be affected by the rugby league. SBS viewers have a different kind of football in their hearts: 391,000 of them stayed up past midnight on Saturday to watch the FA Cup Final from London.

What Australia watched, week ending May 19
1 60 MINUTES Nine 1,552,000
2 IT TAKES TWO Seven 1,546,000
3 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,535,000
4 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING ABC 1,477,000
5 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,469,000
6 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,441,000
7 SPICKS AND SPECKS ABC 1,410,000
8 RPA WHERE ARE THEY NOW? Nine 1,392,000
9 WHERE ARE THEY NOW Seven 1,387,000
10 1 VS 100 Nine 1,386,000
11 NCIS Ten 1,361,000
12 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,356,000
13 HOUSE Ten 1,355,000
14 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,349,000
15 ALL SAINTS Seven 1,325,000
16 POLICE FILES - UNLOCKED Seven 1,313,000
17 CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION Nine 1,307,000
18 DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Seven 1,293,000
19 M-PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL Seven 1,291,000
20 MY NAME IS EARL Seven 1,280,000
21 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,253,000
22 NINE NEWS Nine 1,245,000
23 THE RICH LIST Seven 1,237,000
24 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,218,000
25 LAST CHANCE LEARNERS Seven 1,210,000
26 GETAWAY Nine 1,201,000
27 NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,197,000
28 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,196,000
29 MCLEOD'S DAUGHTERS Nine 1,183,000
30 LOST Seven 1,182,000
31 HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER Seven 1,138,000
32 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,137,000
33 THE NEW INVENTORS ABC 1,132,000
34 BIG BROTHER LIVE NOMINATION Ten 1,130,000
35 ABC NEWS-SUN ABC 1,127,000
36 20 TO 1 Nine 1,126,000
37 CSI: MIAMI Nine 1,110,000
38 M-SHARK TALE Seven 1,108,000
39 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,102,000
40 THE ALL NEW SIMPSONS Ten 1,093,000
(OzTAM mainland capitals)

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. For further observations of Australian attitudes and behaviour, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 09:30 AM
• Comments (151)

The Tribal Mind: America's future is Australia's past

by David Dale
Quirky, oddball and eccentric (QOE) are not a law firm or an advertising agency but three adjectives often applied to: a) Australian movies which have been successful in the past two decades (think Muriel, Priscilla, Castle and Kenny); and b) the dominant style of new programs just announced by the TV networks of America. This question arises: will (a) make it more or less likely that Australians will respond favourably to (b)?

American QOE has not gone down particularly well with Australians lately. The only successful example is My Name Is Earl. Otherwise, Sunday afternoons, silly seasons, and late night limbo are littered with the corpses of classic QOEs such as Scrubs, Arrested Development, Gilmore Girls, Curb Your Enthusasm, Men In Trees, Boston Legal, Weeds and Veronica Mars.

Of course they were as much the victim of erratic scheduling as of any chronic lack of Australian appeal. It is difficult for a viewer to commit to a clever new show when it's on for three weeks, off for three weeks, shown out of order, moved to another night, and finally pushed to an undefined timeslot sometime after 11pm.

So what will happen next year when our curious viewers and nervous programmers are confronted with these scenarios:

Pushing Daisies: about a man who can bring dead things back to life with a touch, but if he touches a newly living thing again, it dies. That creates problems when he revives his recently deceased girlfriend.

Reaper: about a 21-year-old slacker who finds out his parents have sold his soul to the devil and he must embrace his destiny as the Satan's bounty hunter.

The Big Bang Theory: about four quantum physics geniuses who understand the depths of the cosmos but can't figure out life on Earth.

Aliens in America: about a lonely student whose mother arranges a foreign exchange companion who turns out to be a Pakistani Muslim.

Eli Stone: about a lawyer who sees visions as the result of an inoperable brain tumor.

Personally, I reckon they will all flop here (but what would I know, having predicted Ugly Betty would be only a moderate success while Weeds would flourish?). Lets complicate the experiment. What if an American QOE show had an Australian star? Will that make a difference to these projects:

Moonlight: about an "undead" private investigator who's part man, part vampire, and all crimebuster. It stars Alex O'Loughlin, son of AC/DC's Bon Scott.

Viva Laughlin: described by America's showbiz bible Entertainment Weekly as "a gambling story-slash-musical set around a Nevada casino. Think semi-regular Hugh Jackman as a big-shot moneyman, crooning Sympathy for the Devil ... might be quite strange, could be awesome, but will certainly be memorable.''

That's easy for the Americans to say. Australians will be more critical. Tell us your expectations here ...

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 10:49 AM
• Comments (26)

WHO WE ARE: Ratbags on parade

A column about Australia by David Dale, published in The Sun-Herald, 20/5/2007
This nation stands accused of smugness, arrogance, and worst of all, blandness. And this column stands accused of bias. Last week I wondered if Australia was losing its great tradition of ratbaggery - its talent for producing stirrers who inspire and enrage us with ideas that sometimes take decades to turn into conventional wisdom. I nominated Bob Brown, Germaine Greer, Peter Singer, Tim Flannery and Philip Nitschke as Great Aussie Stirrers of the 21 st century.

Several readers pointed out that if we define a ratbag as an individual who provokes debate, then there were three glaring omissions from my list: Pauline Hanson, Sheik Taj El-Din al-Hilaly, and Fred Nile. The readers wondered if I'd excluded them because I disagreed with their opinions. No, it was sheer carelessness on my part. A stirrer is a stimulant to democracy on any side of the philosophical fence. Here are some of the other nominations from readers:

Veronica Brady, a nun who attacks her church's stance on abortion, homosexuality and contraception;
Eva Cox, activist for women's rights;
Pru Goward, who went boots and all into NSW parliament, attacking the sexism of her colleagues on her first day as an MP;
Rachel Griffiths, who took her top off in protest against the Melbourne casino.
Phillip Jensen, the ultra-conservative Anglican Dean of Sydney;
Barnaby Joyce, who resists pressure from his own party and defends what he sees as the needs of his State;
The cartoonist Leunig;
Pat O'Shane, NSW magistrate with a healthy skepticism about the police;
Jenny Shale, "a Queensland teacher with a vision for equity in education";
"The two guys who painted 'No War' on the Opera House".

Such a list tends to contradict the pessimism of most readers about the spreading drought in ratbaggery. Cath Stuart wrote: "Our culture is getting more and more mainstreamed, and there are less and less places for ratbags to exist. If we destroy universities, student unions, trade unions, and (god help us) the AB friggin' C and 'The Glass House', where do we expect 'larrikinism' to exist?

"Most laughter I hear these days is either moronic, extremely bitter and cynical, or too tinged with real despair. Or the smug arrogant kind that thinks if you have enough equity and super and a fat share portfolio for yourself, then nothing else really matters."

Boris wrote: "The sad reality that ultimately Australians are amongst the most passive of populations, which no doubt pleases any incumbent government no end. In modern times it is almost unheard of for Australian people to change things from the ground upwards, and today to have a divergent opinion is too often characterised as 'unAustralian'."

And "The Old Guy" wrote: "In a time of almost vanilla everything, the stirrer spoon should go to anyone willing to put their head above the trench parapet of life and be stupid enough to go over the top. We are so humdrum in our lives. It is unfortunate that in our quest for consumption we have completely forgotten the concept of taste and proportion."

Do you agree? Has the Aussie ratbag been suffocated to death? Join the discussion here

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in Who We Are at 06:30 PM
• Comments (26)

The ratings race: Week 20

This blog is now a heritage item -- worth studying but no longer current. To join the latest discussion on media and popular culture, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.
Updated 10 am Sunday May 20
Thanks to a movie-driven Saturday win for Seven, the prime time audience shares for last week ended up: Seven 30.2 per cent, Nine 25.6, Ten 20.9, ABC 16.9. SBS 6.6.

What Australia watched, Saturday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,356,000 422,000 374,000 216,000 145,000 199,000
2 Movie: PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: THE CURSE OF THE BLACK PEARL Seven 1,291,000 356,000 362,000 234,000 157,000 182,000
3 NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,197,000 276,000 418,000 199,000 170,000 134,000
4 Movie: SHARK TALE Seven 1,108,000 278,000 309,000 217,000 124,000 180,000
5 AUSTRALIA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEO SHOW Nine 1,029,000 268,000 330,000 188,000 111,000 132,000
6 NEW TRICKS RPT ABC 881,000 240,000 302,000 119,000 112,000 107,000
7 ABC NEWS-SAT ABC 859,000 254,000 285,000 151,000 67,000 102,000
8 The BILL ABC 831,000 229,000 268,000 143,000 93,000 98,000
11 PRIMEVAL Nine 705,000 181,000 214,000 138,000 72,000 100,000
15 SATURDAY AFTERNOON AFL Ten 619,000 66,000 253,000 69,000 89,000 143,000
18 SATURDAY NIGHT AFL Ten 526,000 287,000 62,000 93,000 84,000
23 2007 FA CUP FINAL SBS 391,000 133,000 111,000 33,000 45,000 69,000.
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

What Australia watched, Friday
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,405,000 411,000 345,000 246,000 168,000 235,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,283,000 362,000 337,000 201,000 171,000 212,000
3 NINE NEWS Nine 1,178,000 311,000 421,000 233,000 118,000 96,000
4 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,102,000 365,000 351,000 146,000 80,000 160,000
5 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,097,000 267,000 391,000 217,000 116,000 105,000
6 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,089,000 344,000 274,000 168,000 141,000 162,000
7 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,061,000 253,000 357,000 192,000 128,000 131,000
15 PUSSYCAT DOLLS PRESENT: THE SEARCH FOR THE NEXT DOLL FRI Ten 766,000 177,000 276,000 131,000 98,000 84,000
16 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 8: ADELAIDE V RICHMOND Seven 741,000 35,000 382,000 11,000 201,000 113,000
23 NINE'S LIVE FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 539,000 S337,000 B202,000.
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am Friday May 18
So farewell Fast Eddie. We'd like to hear your comments on his contribution to Australian television, below.

Be it noted that the night before Black Bogie winner Eddie McGuire announced his resignation as Chief Executive of Channel Nine, his station had the highest prime time audience share: 30.2 per cent, while Seven attracted 29.0 per cent. But it wasn't enough, because Nine will come second this week, as it has done every week of the year so far.

This column wrote last Sunday: "What hope is there for Eddie McGuire when Channel Nine can't even win a week which begins with the Logies? Despite a huge start on Sunday night, Nine averaged 28.5 per cent of the prime time audience last week, while Seven averaged 29.4 per cent. It was the first time in history that Nine has failed to win Logies week. Of course, Eddie foresaw this eventuality. He knows he'll be the scapegoat when Nine ends the year as Number Two. That's why he made himself host of the game show 1 vs 100 -- so he'll have something to do when he gets boned as Nine's Chief Executive in November." As it turned out, November came early this year.

What Australia watched, Thursday
Description Channel 5 City Metro Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 TODAY TONIGHT Network 7 1,477,000 379,000 436,000 290,000 168,000 205,000
2 SEVEN NEWS Network 7 1,455,000 384,000 416,000 276,000 167,000 212,000
3 RPA WHERE ARE THEY NOW? 9 1,386,000 430,000 408,000 231,000 171,000 146,000
4 MY NAME IS EARL 7 1,280,000 321,000 384,000 276,000 138,000 160,000
5 NINE NEWS 9 1,210,000 312,000 419,000 220,000 145,000 114,000
6 A CURRENT AFFAIR 9 1,208,000 304,000 439,000 218,000 119,000 128,000
7 GETAWAY 9 1,197,000 337,000 393,000 220,000 120,000 128,000
8 LOST 7 1,182,000 338,000 372,000 216,000 125,000 131,000
9 HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER 7 1,138,000 309,000 310,000 237,000 125,000 157,000
10 HOME AND AWAY 7 1,108,000 329,000 299,000 216,000 121,000 144,000
15 THE FOOTY SHOW 9 930,000 235,000 356,000 123,000 123,000 93,000

Updated 10am Thursday May 17
To learn about the programs planned for the next season in America, click here.

Instead of stealing viewers from House, the Chaser boys seem to have brought a new audience to television. Their numbers keep growing, and yet House is staging a steady recovery. And at the same time, Cold Case on Nine and Heroes on Seven each get more than 1 million viewers in the mainland capitals. The timeslot 8.30 to 9.30 Wednesday has become one of the most watched hours of the week.

The ABC and Ten did well, but Seven won the night, and the prime time audience shares for the week so far are Seven 29.3 per cent, Nine 25.6, Ten 21.3, ABC 17.4, and SBS 6.3.

What Australia watched, Wednesday
1. Seven News Seven 1.592m
2. The Chaser's War on Everything ABC 1.484
3. Spicks and Specks ABC 1.391
4. Today Tonight Seven 1.380
5. House Ten 1.356
6. Police Files - Unlocked Seven 1.313
7. Nine News Nine 1.241
8. Last Chance Learners Seven 1.210
9. Home and Away Seven 1.185
10. McLeod's Daughters Nine 1.184
11. A Current Affair Nine 1.177
12. The New Inventors ABC 1.138
13. ABC News ABC 1.097
14. Temptation Nine 1.055
15. The 7:30 Report ABC 1.037
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

What Australia watched, Tuesday
1. Seven News Seven 1.540
2. It Takes Two Seven 1.540
3. Today Tonight Seven 1.479
4. All Saints Seven 1.367
5. NCIS Ten 1.361
6. Home and Away Seven 1.279
7. Nine News Nine 1.237
8. A Current Affair Nine 1.191
9. 20 to 1 Nine 1.116
10. The Simpsons - 7:30pm Ten 1.093
11. ABC News ABC 1.080
12. The Simpsons - 8:00pm Ten 1.078
13. Temptation Nine 1.064
14. Big Brother Ten 1.009
15. Deal or No Deal Seven 0.904

What Australia watched, Monday
1. Seven News Seven 1.685
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.571
3. A Current Affair Nine 1.432
4. 1 vs 100 Nine 1.381
5. National Nine News Nine 1.337
6. Home and Away Seven 1.319
7. Desperate Housewives Seven 1.293
8. The Rich List Seven 1.237
9. Temptation Nine 1.154
10. Big Brother - Live Nomination Ten 1.129
11. What's Good For You Nine 1.079
12. ABC News ABC 1.060
13. Big Brother - 7:00pm Ten 1.049
14. CSI: NY Nine 1.005
15. Brothers & Sisters Seven 1.003

What Australia watched, Sunday
1. 60 Minutes Nine 1.549m
2. Seven News Seven 1.460
3. Where Are They Now Seven 1.383
4. Nine News Nine 1.349
5. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Nine 1.315
6. Grey's Anatomy Seven 1.258
7. Ugly Betty Seven 1.154
8. ABC News ABC 1.127
9. CSI: Miami Nine 1.114
10. Big Brother - Eviction Ten 1.085
11. Robin Hood ABC 1.035
12. Rove Ten 1.004
13. Bastard Boys ABC 0.972
14. The Lost Tribes Nine 0.971
15. Big Brother - 6:30pm Ten 0.930
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 4pm Sunday May 13
What hope is there for Eddie McGuire when Channel Nine can't even win a week which begins with the Logies? Despite a huge start on Sunday night, Nine averaged 28.5 per cent of the prime time audience last week, while Seven averaged 29.4 per cent. It was the first time in history that Nine has failed to win Logies week.

Of course, Eddie foresaw this eventuality. He knows he'll be the scapegoat when Nine ends the year as Number Two. That's why he made himself host of the game show 1 vs 100 -- so he'll have something to do when he gets boned as Nine's Chief Executive in November.

It's not as if Seven had much to write home about last week. The latest talent quest, It Takes Two, came nowhere near the audience of Dancing With The Stars. But at a time when Seven's younger viewers should be shifting to Big Brother, Ten could only average 21.4 per cent.

The only network with any reason to celebrate is the ABC, which is going gangbusters with The Chaser's War On Everything and Spicks and Specks. It averaged 14.9 per cent of the prime time audience -- dragged down by its obligation to run political performances on two nights. On Tuesday Peter Costello's budget speech attracted 707,000 viewers in the mainland capitals, and on Thursday Kevin Rudd's me-too response attracted 718,000. Politicial analysts may see meaning in that 11,000 difference.

What Australia watched, week ending May 12
1 LOGIE AWARDS Nine 1,694,000
2 LOGIE ARRIVALS Nine 1,558,000
3 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,549,000
4 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,548,000
5 IT TAKES TWO Seven 1,515,000
6 WHERE ARE THEY NOW Seven 1,504,000
7 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,491,000
8 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,477,000
9 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,408,000
10 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING ABC 1,407,000
11 SPICKS AND SPECKS ABC 1,378,000
12 HOUSE Ten 1,377,000
13 DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Seven 1,356,000
14 1 VS 100 Nine 1,352,000
15 50 TO 1 Nine 1,310,000
16 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,304,000
17 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,299,000
18 GETAWAY Nine 1,288,000
19 THE RICH LIST Seven 1,271,000
20 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,251,000
21 ALL SAINTS Seven 1,236,000
22 NATIONAL NINE NEWS Nine 1,223,000
23 MY NAME IS EARL Seven 1,205,000
24 POLICE FILES - UNLOCKED Seven 1,196,000
25 LAW & ORDER: CRIMINAL INTENT Ten 1,183,000
26 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,183,000
27 MCLEOD'S DAUGHTERS Nine 1,182,000
28 LAST CHANCE LEARNERS Seven 1,162,000
29 LAW AND ORDER: SVU Ten 1,151,000
30 AUSTRALIA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEO SHOW Nine 1,149,000
31 GREAT COMEDY CLASSICS Seven 1,145,000
32 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,136,000
33 LOST Seven 1,130,000
34 BROTHERS & SISTERS Seven 1,113,000
35 BIG BROTHER - GOLDEN KEY SPECIAL Ten 1,102,000
36 NCIS Ten 1,098,000
37 WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU Nine 1,091,000
38 TEMPTATION Nine 1,085,000
39 ABC NEWS-SUN ABC 1,084,000
40 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,079,000
(OzTAM mainland capitals)

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. For further observations of Australian attitudes and behaviour, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 10:33 AM
• Comments (151)

On the town: Now you see them, now...

by David Dale
THIS column normally doesn't do glitz. We leave it to other pages and other papers. But Tuesday was Red Carpet Day in the US, with a truly extraordinary concatenation of launches, premieres, openings and awards to signify the start of summer. So we had to display a sampling of the frocked-up celebrities who attended them - and open up speculation about those who did not.

Left you see what remains of the Bee Gees, who were attending the Broadcast Music Awards. No need to wonder about the whereabouts of the other one; Maurice died in 2003. And the absence of Rachel Griffiths from the Brothers and Sisters team, below, is explained by her being in Sydney while her husband displays paintings in Paddington.

But look at the Despos attending the launch of the new season's programming for the US ABC network. What behind-the-scenes bitch battle is implied by the absence of Nicolette Sheridan (Edie)? And don't even get us started on who's missing from Heroes (below).

To learn about the programs planned for the next season in America, click here.

We welcome your comments.

David Dale is the author of The Little Book of Australia -- A snapshot of who we are (Allen and Unwin). For daily updates on Australian attitudes, bookmark blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• in The Tribal Mind at 12:20 AM
• Comments (1)

Culture: Spidey takes a tumble

Word of mouth on the new Spider-Man movie has apparently been abysmal. The Motion Picture Distributors Association of Australia reports that in its second weekend in cinemas, box office for Spider-Man 3 dropped 56 per cent (bringing total takings to $16.2 million). By contrast, ticket sales for Diane Keaton's Because I Said So dropped 12 per cent on its second weekend, which included Mother's Day. It now totals $2 million.

Some 80,000 people took their mothers to see the debut of the latest zombie bloodlust thriller, 28 Weeks Later, which made $734,000, and Lucky You, the pairing of Our Own Eric Bana with the perennially perky Drew Barrymore, managed just $372,000.

We welcome your comments.

David Dale is the author of The Little Book of Australia -- A snapshot of who we are (Allen and Unwin). For daily updates on Australian attitudes, bookmark blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• in The Tribal Mind at 01:00 AM
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The Tribal Mind: These are the next big things

Go to the end of this story to read about the new programs unveiled on Tuesday in the US, but first, read our preview ...

THREE years ago Television As We Know It (TAWKI) was in its death throes. Three Samaritans happened along to save its life: Desperate Housewives, which added thrills and laughs to the traditional soap format, Grey's Anatomy, which added soap and sex to the traditional hospital format, and Lost, which created a whole new format.

Those programs, so invigorating in their day, have now settled into comfortable ruts, and television again faces a tipping point. The shows to be launched by the US networks this week will reveal whether the spirit of adventure still prevails or if TAWKI is about to fall back into its death throes.

We've been given a few clues about this week's announcements. Can you see any patterns for the next three years in these story outlines?

The Cashmere Mafia, the adventures of three career women (played by Lucy Liu, Bonnie Somerville and Our Own Frances O'Connor).

Lipstick Jungle, the adventures of three career women, adapted from a novel by Candace Bushnell (author of Sex and The City), starring Brooke Shields (Blue Lagoon), Kim Raver (24) and Lindsay Price, replacing our own Melissa George, who left due to "creative differences''.

Private Practice, a spin-off from Grey's Anatomy, in which a redhaired pediatric surgeon, Addison Montgomery-Shepherd (Kate Walsh), moves from Seattle to Los Angeles.

Gossip Girls, based on a series of novels about a teenage socialite who spies on her rich friends and blogs about them. The writer is Josh Schwartz, who created The OC.

Chuck, also by Josh Schwartz, about "a geek who becomes the government's most powerful weapon'' after secrets are embedded in his brain via an encoded email.

Back To You, a sitcom in which Kelsey Grammer (Frasier) is a womanising newsreader and Patricia Heaton (Everybody Loves Raymond) is his "uptight co-anchor''.

The Bionic Woman, about "a bartender and surrogate mother to her teenage sister who is rebuilt as a superhero after a car accident''.

Journeyman, in which a young father suddenly finds himself travelling into the past, affecting other people's lives as he reconnects with his ex-fiancee.

Life, about a cop imprisoned for a crime he didn't commit who tries to rejoin the police force.

OK, see any influences from recent hit shows there? And any patterns that might suggest the US networks are seeking audience segments not currently watching enough TV (at first sight, say, women under 40, teenagers and cybergeeks)? And can you estimate which of those might work best in Australia next year -- perhaps to bring Channel Nine back to its former glory?

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

Here's a Reuters report on the new programming unveiled in the US on Tuesday: The latest crop of prime-time offerings from the Disney-owned ABC network is built around lighter, escapist shows, with character-driven stories, female protagonists and supernatural themes. The network even picked up a comedy called Cavemen, adapted from the commercials for a company called Geico as an offbeat commentary on ethnic prejudice from the perspective of three prehistoric guys trying to make their way in the modern world.
But ABC shied away from the kind of complex, serialized mystery dramas that it helped popularize on network TV with the early success of its castaway thriller Lost, which shed some of its ratings clout this past season.
"It's a real different year this year than last year,'' said ABC Entertainment President Stephen McPherson. He described a shift away from "hard, dense, demanding'' shows that have fallen somewhat out of favor with viewers.
Not only does that mean more light drama for 2007-08, but it also resulted in the introduction of four new comedies.
"The good thing about comedies is that they've been broken for a few years so people are willing to take chances,'' McPherson said.
Rival NBC had rolled out five new dramas, several of which featured science fiction and female empowerment themes, including a 21st-century remake of the 1970s adventure Bionic Woman
Among the higher-profile dramas on the new ABC lineup is the Grey's Anatomy' spinoff Private Practice which follows Dr. Addison Montgomery as she leaves her Seattle hospital to join a ritzy practice in California.
ABC is hoping the new show will build on the largely female-skewing fan base of Grey's Anatomy which ranks this season as the second-most watched drama on U.S. television, behind CBS's CSI: Crime Scene Investigation.
ABC is looking to extend the trend with several of its new shows, including two dramas built around predominantly female casts -- Cashmere Mafia, from Sex and the City creator Darren Star, and Women's Murder Club which has been billed as `Sex and the City meets CSI
Other ABC drama pickups include Eli Stone, the story of a lawyer who thinks he may be a prophet; Pushing Daisies a detective show about a guy who can bring the dead to life; and Big Shots, involving the boardroom and bedroom intrigues of four dysfunctional CEOs.
On the comedy front, ABC will add Sam I Am starring Christina Applegate as a recovering amnesiac; Miss/Guided about an ugly duckling who returns to her old school as a guidance counselor; and the male buddy sitcom Carpoolers.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 12:10 AM
• Comments (46)

WHO WE ARE: Raise the ratbag flag

A column about Australia by David Dale, published in The Sun-Herald, 13/5/2007
Call them stirrers, visionaries, or ratbags. They surprise us, irritate us, inspire us and entertain us. Australia has a great tradition of savagely mocking them in their lifetimes and building statues to them after their deaths, when their outrageous ideas have turned into conventional wisdom. But I'm wondering if this country's historic embracing of stirrers is fading.

The 19th century was a golden age of ratbaggery. In the 1830s there was Robert Lyon, a Sydney teacher, who urged making a peace treaty with the original inhabitants of the continent or "your own children, for whose sakes ye have invaded the country, will join with the disinherited offspring of those ye have slain to pour a flood of curses upon your memory".

In the 1840s there was Robert Lowe, a lawyer, who rallied 5000 people to Circular Quay to block the arrival of a convict ship, and warned that if Britain did not stop sending this form of slave labour for the rich farmers, "so will injustice and tyranny ripen into rebellion, and rebellion into independence". (The Brits listened, stopped sending slaves, and an Australian revolution was averted -- some might say unfortunately).

In the 1880s, Louisa Lawson wondered why women were treated as property: "Every man may vote, let his character be bad, his judgement purchasable, and his intellect of the weakest, but an honourable and thoughtful and good woman may be laughed at by such men." She was so silly.

From the 20th century, we have to thank the likes of Arthur Calwell for pushing through the biggest immigration program the world had ever seen, Don Dunstan for pioneering law reform on abortion and sexual preference, and Jack Mundey for demonstrating that unions have a social responsibility beyond making money for their members.

But what's the state of ratbaggery today? Two of the most stimulating stirrers of recent decades - Malcolm Turnbull and Peter Garrett - have been absorbed and neutralised by the political system. That leaves us with these nominees for the title of Top Stirrer of the Noughties:

Bob Brown He's been the only consistent Opposition leader for the past ten years, speaking against detention of asylum seekers, the weakening of industrial relations laws, and the sending of troops to Iraq, when Labor was unable to get its act together. And of course, Brown was green long before global warming was the cause du jour.

Peter Singer He introduced the concept of animal liberation, and has successfully combined rigorous logic with ethical humanism.

Tim Flannery He's been making the case for Australia to cut its population to below 18 million or risk depleting the landscape, and now he's challenging us to rethink our attitudes to nuclear energy.

Philip Nitschke After almost getting voluntary euthanasia legalised in the Northern Territory, he's still campaigning for the right of terminally ill patients to end their own lives.

Germaine Greer She retains her talent to amaze and outrage. Just when you thought you'd figured out what she believes, she challenges you on a whole new issue.

Those are my suggestions for the stirrers we'll be honouring next decade. If you'd like to suggest others, proceed here ...

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in Who We Are at 04:10 PM
• Comments (34)

The ratings race: Week 19

This blog is now a heritage item -- worth studying but no longer current. To join the latest discussion on media and popular culture, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.
Channel Nine won Saturday night, but not by enough. Over the week, Seven averaged 29.4 per cent of the prime time audience, Nine averaged 28.5, Ten 21.4, ABC 14.9 and SBS 5.8. Nine's only hope this year is that Seven has nothing of interest for the second half, when hits like Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy have ended their seasons. It does raise the possibility that Seven might break the habit of a lifetime and start running the new episodes of its top shows close to their showing times in America.

What Australia watched, Saturday
1 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,477,000 S371,000 M440,000 B291,000 A142,000 P233,000
2 AUSTRALIA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEO SHOW Nine 1,149,000 316,000 365,000 205,000 119,000 144,000
3 GREAT COMEDY CLASSICS Seven 1,145,000 302,000 358,000 218,000 99,000 168,000
4 NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,045,000 312,000 306,000 188,000 132,000 106,000
5 THE GREAT OUTDOORS Seven 1,023,000 293,000 312,000 212,000 74,000 132,000
6 CROCODILE DUNDEE -RPT Nine 923,000 242,000 258,000 168,000 118,000 136,000
7 SATURDAY NIGHT AFL Ten 919,000 122,000 338,000 105,000 221,000 133,000
8 PRIMEVAL Nine 909,000 235,000 255,000 196,000 108,000 116,000
9 ABC NEWS-SA ABC 850,000 249,000 282,000 126,000 71,000 123,000
10 THE INSPECTOR LYNLEY MYSTERIES Seven 830,000 211,000 269,000 141,000 90,000 118,000
11 THE BILL ABC 692,000 205,000 224,000 120,000 54,000 89,000
15 THE SIDESHOW WITH PAUL MCDERMOTT ABC 635,000 189,000 225,000 85,000 56,000 80,000
17 SATURDAY AFTERNOON AFL Ten 527,000 61,000 212,000 52,000 119,000 83,000
20 THE LOST TRIBES -ENCORE Nine 468,000 117,000 158,000 105,000 29,000 60,000
26 EUROVISION SONG CONTEST 2007 SEMI-FINAL SBS 305,000 99,000 116,000 33,000 25,000 33,000

Updated 10 am Saturday May 12
Ooh, the suspense. At this point in the week, Seven is slightly ahead, averaging 29.7 per cent of the prime time audience to Nine's 28.7 per cent. Seven won Friday night because the southwesterners' enthusiasm for AFL outweighs the northeasteners' enthusiasm for NRL.

But this could still end up as Nine's first winning week of the year, because Nine has a habit of winning Saturdays.

What Australia watched, Friday
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,424,000 351,000 394,000 278,000 168,000 233,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,333,000 351,000 390,000 223,000 180,000 191,000
3 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,299,000 408,000 424,000 152,000 145,000 169,000
4 NINE NEWS Nine 1,192,000 344,000 365,000 212,000 163,000 108,000
5 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,155,000 317,000 411,000 197,000 132,000 99,000
6 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,079,000 267,000 338,000 182,000 137,000 154,000
7 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,076,000 328,000 300,000 184,000 125,000 140,000
8 TEMPTATION Nine 1,025,000 284,000 387,000 138,000 118,000 99,000
9 ABC NEWS ABC 1,019,000 276,000 297,000 185,000 106,000 156,000
10 BIG BROTHER Ten 895,000 244,000 255,000 164,000 113,000 119,000
18 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 7: KANGAROOS V ESSENDON Seven 754,000 34,000 425,000 17,000 143,000 135,000
21 NINE'S LIVE FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 592,000 S346,000 B246,000
33 NINE'S FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 371,000 S259,000 B112,000

What Australia watched, Thursday
1. Seven News Seven 1.486
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.409
3. Getaway Nine 1.285
4. My Name Is Earl Seven 1.205
5. Home and Away Seven 1.202
6. Law and Order: Criminal Intent Ten 1.187
7. Law and Order: SVU Ten 1.152
8. Nine News Nine 1.149
9. Lost Seven 1.130
10. A Current Affair Nine 1.092
11. Temptation Nine 1.071
12. How I Met Your Mother Seven 1.069
13. The Footy Show Nine 0.988
14. ABC News ABC 0.967
15. Big Brother Ten 0.883
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

But to demonstrate how divided the audience is by age, here's how younger viewers spent Thursday night:
Top Programs 18-49
1 Lost - 7
2 My Name Is Earl - 7
3 How I Met Your Mother - 7
4 Law & Order Criminal Intent - 10
5 Amazing Race All Stars - 7
6 Big Brother - 10
7 Law & Order SVU - 10
8 The Footy Show - 9
9 Home & Away - 7
10 Seven News - 7

What Australia watched, Wednesday
1. Seven News Seven 1.632
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.585
3. The Chaser's War on Everything ABC 1.410
4. Spicks and Specks ABC 1.378
5. House Ten 1.367
6. Home and Away Seven 1.300
7. A Current Affair Nine 1.225
8. Police Files - Unlocked Seven 1.196
9. National Nine News Nine 1.191
10. McLeod's Daughters Nine 1.184
11. Last Chance Learners Seven 1.162
12. Temptation Nine 1.106
13. Big Brother - 7:30pm Ten 1.091
14. ABC News ABC 1.047
15. Heroes Seven 1.046
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 10 am, Wednesday May 9
At this point a year ago, this column wrote the following report: "Peter Costello's budget speech on the ABC at 7.30 attracted 798,000 viewers in the mainland capitals on Tuesday night -- a strangely small audience for such an important national event. Apparently a few Australians were distracted by some sort of dancing show on Channel Seven, which pulled in 2.7 million viewers. There were also newsbreaks on the commercial stations about some sort of mining story."

Ah, nostalgia. Last Tuesday night there were no such distractions -- Beaconsfield was at peace and Dancing With The Stars had been replaced by It Takes Two which attracted a mere 1.5 million viewers in the mainland capitals. So of course the Treasurer's budget bonanza speech was bound to attract many more viewers than last year.

Er, no. It pulled just 707,000. So whatever else he may be, the aspirant Liberal leader is not a ratings-grabber. For the sake of the party, could it be time for him to hand over to the more telegenic Tony Abbott?

Channel Nine finds itself in the rare position of having a chance of winning the week. Although Seven won last night, It Takes Two did not do as well as Dancing, and the prime time audience shares for the week so far stand at: Nine 30.7 per cent, Seven 30.2 per cent, Ten 19.6, ABC 13.7, SBS 5.8.

What Australia watched, Tuesday
1. Seven News Seven 1.547m
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.528
3. It Takes Two Seven 1.515
4. 50 to 1 Nine 1.303
5. Home and Away Seven 1.300
6. Nine News Nine 1.239
7. All Saints Seven 1.236
8. A Current Affair Nine 1.180
9. Temptation Nine 1.130
10. NCIS Ten 1.099
11. ABC News ABC 1.069
12. The Simpsons - 7:30pm Ten 1.003
13. CSI: Crime Scene Investigation Nine 0.985
14. Deal or No Deal Seven 0.943
15. Big Brother - 7:00pm Ten 0.943
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Just to prove that this year's Big Brother is not the flop the critics are claiming, Channel Ten this morning put out a press release which began "Big Brother continues to rate highly in TEN's target 18-49 demographic with strong timeslot wins for both Monday shows". It offered this list of most watched programs last night with viewers in that age group: 1 Desperate Housewives (7). 2 Big Brother Live Nominations - 10. 3 Brothers & Sisters - 7. 4 Big Brother - 10. 5 Home & Away - 7. 6 Today Tonight - 7. 7 Seven News - 7. 8 Supernatural - 10.

Meanwhile, Seven won the night with all viewers, but is only on 28.3 per cent of the prime time audience for the week so far, while Nine is on 32.5 per cent. Much depends on whether tonight's It Takes Two can hold most of the viewers who had stuck with Dancing With The Stars.

What Australia watched, Monday
1. Seven News Seven 1.649
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.585
3. Home and Away Seven 1.376
4. Desperate Housewives Seven 1.356
5. 1 vs 100 Nine 1.348
6. Nine News Nine 1.328
7. A Current Affair Nine 1.276
8. The Rich List Seven 1.271
9. Brothers & Sisters Seven 1.113
10. Temptation Nine 1.093
11. What's Good For You Nine 1.083
12. ABC News ABC 1.052
13. Big Brother - Live Nomination Ten 1.038
14. Big Brother - 7:00pm Ten 0.980
15. Ten News Ten 0.963
We hope it wasn't anything we said. Last week this column announced the winners of The Bogies, which are awards for achievement in television. Last night Channel Nine's version, called The Logies, got its lowest audience in a decade. Channel Nine still won the night, with 38 per cent of the prime time viewers, but gone are the days when 2 million Australians in the mainland capitals would tune in for the red carpet arrivals. Nine's new semi-reality show, The Lost Tribes also had a disastrous debut against Where Are They Now

What Australia watched, Sunday
1 LOGIE AWARDS Nine 1,718,000 472,000 638,000 256,000 197,000 154,000
2 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,544,000 374,000 418,000 312,000 201,000 238,000
3 LOGIE ARRIVALS Nine 1,541,000 385,000 597,000 227,000 162,000 170,000
4 WHERE ARE THEY NOW Seven 1,506,000 413,000 416,000 299,000 178,000 200,000
5 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,408,000 395,000 492,000 185,000 197,000 140,000
6 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,298,000 403,000 387,000 193,000 132,000 182,000
7 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,149,000 316,000 330,000 190,000 135,000 177,000
8 ABC NEWS-SUN ABC 1,088,000 326,000 312,000 166,000 120,000 164,000
9 BIG BROTHER LIVE EVICTION Ten 1,038,000 312,000 277,000 172,000 145,000 131,000
10 ROBIN HOOD ABC 1,018,000 313,000 301,000 146,000 118,000 140,000
12 THE LOST TRIBES Nine 991,000 248,000 360,000 136,000 114,000 132,000
21 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 6: MELBOURNE V PORT ADELAIDE Seven 498,000 14,000 243,000 9,000 141,000 91,000
24 NINE'S SUNDAY FOOTBALL Nine 412,000 262,000 137,000 13,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Australian televiewers love a grand finale and last week they revelled in two of them -- a Sunday freak show called Australia's Got Talent and a Tuesday schmoozefest called Dancing With The Stars. They were the reason Channel Seven won yet another week in the ratings race, averaging 29.2 per cent of the prime time audience, and the reason Seven will be worrying about retaining its lead this week.

Channel Nine won Sunday, Wednesday, Thursday and Saturday, and ended up averaging 27.2 per cent for the week, a figure which is bound to rise once Seven loses its grip on Tuesday nights. Dancing will be replaced by It Takes Two, which averaged only 1.5 million viewers last year.

Ten should have done better than 22.1 per cent, but Big Brother's brigade of blondes just isn't firing this year, and on Wednesdays House is regularly blown down by Spicks and Specks and The Chaser's War on Everything, which both attract more than 1.3 million viewers in the mainland capitals.

That's why the ABC managed a healthy 15.6 share for the week. That left SBS with 5.6 per cent, largely due to Mythbusters (657,000) and an Inspector Rex repeat (433,000).

What Australia watched, week ending May 5, 2007
1 DANCING WITH THE STARS - GRAND FINAL Seven 2,199,000
2 60 MINUTES Nine 1,679,000
3 CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION Nine 1,643,000
4 AUSTRALIA'S GOT TALENT Seven 1,639,000
5 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,633,000
6 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,586,000
7 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,508,000
8 CSI: MIAMI Nine 1,428,000
9 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,423,000
10 BIG BROTHER - FULL HOUSE Ten 1,403,000
11 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,395,000
12 20 TO 1 Nine 1,377,000
13 SPICKS AND SPECKS ABC 1,358,000
14 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING ABC 1,355,000
15 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,301,000
16 DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Seven 1,298,000
17 BIG BROTHER LIVE NOMINATION Ten 1,296,000
18 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,292,000
19 1 VS 100 Nine 1,268,000
20 MCLEOD'S DAUGHTERS Nine 1,240,000
21 THE RICH LIST Seven 1,218,000
22 BIG BROTHER - WILD CARD ENTRY Ten 1,215,000
23 NATIONAL NINE NEWS Nine 1,201,000
24 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,193,000
25 MY NAME IS EARL Seven 1,178,000
26 BIG BROTHER SUN Ten 1,173,000
27 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,170,000
28 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,169,000
29 HOUSE RPT Ten 1,165,000
30 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,162,000
31 COLD CASE Nine 1,147,000
32 GETAWAY Nine 1,126,000
33 CSI: NY Nine 1,112,000
34 LOST Seven 1,104,000
35 POLICE FILES - UNLOCKED Seven 1,101,000
(OzTAM mainland capitals)
David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. For further observations of Australian attitudes and behaviour, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 07:31 AM
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Stop-work stops Stay in Touch

The Stay in Touch column was delayed today because journalists at The Sydney Morning Herald and The Sun-Herald have gone on strike in protest at the Fairfax company's failure to consult about cutting 35 jobs of sub-editors and designers.

• in The Tribal Mind at 10:00 AM
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The Tribal Mind: Reunited we sit

by David Dale
LORD be praised, the blockbuster is back. This column was beginning to worry that Australians were so fragmented in their tastes that they'd never again unite around a single movie, TV show, or music collection. Then along comes Spider-Man at the cinema, Dancing with the Stars on the box and Missy Higgins on disc, and the world is set to rights.

This column's function is to track and explain the shared experiences of Australians. It was easy when the nation marched in lockstep to embrace Crocodile Dundee, The Lord of the Rings and Titanic; or Backyard Blitz, Friends and the Logies red carpet; or Delta Goodrem, John Farnham and Abba. But, as the noughties advanced, it was becoming a considerable stretch to discuss what "the mass market'' was consuming.

We've been trying to keep an archive of the all-time most seen movies, most watched TV shows and most bought albums, but the archive has been gathering dust in recent months.

To qualify for the chart of 100 top grossing films of all time, a movie needs to sell more than $18 million worth of tickets, which means it has been seen by at least 2 million people (to see the list, go to The flicks Australia loved). So far this year we have not needed to update the top 100. The biggest hits, Mr. Bean's Holiday and Wild Hogs, stopped at $17 million.

The last truly nation-uniting movie was Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, which made $38 million in 2006. But after last weekend's takings ($9.5 million), it's clear that Spider-Man 3 will leap into the top 100 within a few weeks, despite the inevitable word of mouth that will brand it the least interesting of the trio. It will soon be joined in the movie chart by Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, Shrek The Third and Ocean's 13.

To qualify for our chart of 50 all-time most successful musicians, an album needs to sell more than half a million copies (go to The music Australia loved). The last performer to achieve this was James Blunt with Back To Bedlam last year. Before him it was Missy Higgins with The Sound of White.

On the Australian Record Industry Association chart released yesterday, the new Higgins album, On a Clear Night appears at number one and is classified as platinum, which means the record company was confident enough to release 70,000 copies. Now that music lovers do most of their listening online, downloading tracks both legally and illegally, there's not a high probability that OACN will reach half a million sales. But if anyone can do it, Higgins can.

To rate as one of the most watched programs of all time a TV event must attract more than 2.1 million viewers in the mainland capitals (go to The shows Australia loved). The only obvious addition to that chart lately was last week's grand finale of Dancing with the Stars.

But finales are notorious (and symbolic) exceptions to the general decline of Australian free-to-air viewing. It's hard to envisage such a figure for any of the other programs promised for the rest of the year. The growing diversity of our community proves to be both a nuisance and a challenge.

David Dale is the author of The Little Book of Australia -- A snapshot of who we are (Allen and Unwin). For daily updates on Australian attitudes, bookmark blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 05:52 PM
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WHO WE ARE: Got to admit it's getting better

A column about Australia by David Dale, published in The Sun-Herald, 6/5/2007
One of the most endearing qualities of Australians is their modesty, as manifested in the cultural cringe and the tall poppy syndrome. But there's one time in the year when we must cast aside the drab cloak of humility and celebrate an inescapable fact: almost every day, in almost every way, we are getting better and better.

The proof is in the annual MAP report released by the Bureau of Statistics, where MAP stands for Measures of Australia's Progress. The Bureau has isolated what it calls 14 "headline dimensions" on which the nation's mental, physical and financial health can be judged. And this year we seem to be doing brilliantly on ten of them.

You can read the full report on the ABS site, so I'll just breeze through the bottom lines. First the positives:

We're getting healthier. Life expectancy is now four years longer than it was ten years ago, so a man should reach 78, and a women 83. There's a catch though -- if you are Aboriginal, your life expectancy is 17 years less than the rest of the community.

We're better educated Now 59 per cent of adults have an after-school qualification (degree, diploma, etc) compared with 48 per cent back in 1995.

More of us are working, and we're earning more. The unemployment rate dropped from 8.2 per cent in 1996 to 4.9 per cent in 2006. The average "real net national disposable income" is rising by 3 per cent a year. And this isn't just the rich getting richer. The bureau says the income of the poorest segment of the community rose 22 per cent over the past ten years.

We're comfortable at home. Most of us - 77 per cent - live in houses with one or more spare bedrooms. Only 3 per cent live in accommodation that is too small for their needs.

We help each other. Or at least, we say we do -- "Between 1995 and 2002, the proportion of people aged 18 years and over who reported that they did some voluntary work during the previous 12 months rose from 24 per cent to 34 per cent".

We're more egalitarian. Over the past 20 years, the proportion of women MPs in the House of Representatives has risen from one in 20 to one in four..

But here's the downside of all that lovely progress:

We're endangering our animals and depleting our oceans. Australia is one of the most biodiverse continents on earth, but, says the Bureau, "between 1996 and 2006 the number of bird and mammal species assessed as extinct, endangered or vulnerable rose by 44 per cent, from 119 to 171 ... In 2005, for fish stocks managed by the Australian Government, 24 of the 83 principal species were overfished or subject to overfishing. This compares with 3 species in 1996."

We're degrading our soil and polluting our air. About 4.6 million hectares of agricultural land are "affected with high salinity hazard", says the Bureau, and Australia's greenhouse gas emissions are 2.3 per cent above 1993 levels, "largely reflecting increases in emissions from energy, industrial processes and land use, land use change and forestry".

Maybe next year's MAP report will show how we've started spending some of that extra money we're making on protecting our country's future. What do you reckon?

David Dale is the author of The Little Book of Australia -- A snapshot of who we are (Allen and Unwin). For daily updates on Australian attitudes, bookmark blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in Who We Are at 06:58 AM
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The Tribal Mind: Announcing television's haul of infamy

WE DECIDED to skip the red carpet this year and go straight to announcing the winners of the coveted Bogie awards for 2007. This new system of honours was suggested by an alert reader, Grant James, and we received hundreds of nominations and votes for the people, programs and stations that deeply affected viewers during the past 12 months.

Unlike the Logies, we operate on a policy of transparency. We will reveal exactly how many votes each nominee received (Click nominations to see how it all started, and voting to see every reader's comment).

The envelope, please. And the Bogies go to ...
Most embarrassing program: the ads on SBS (2 votes); Cheaters (4); A Current Affair (10); The Con Test (10); ABBAmania (12); Quizmania (15); Celebrity Pet School (17); The Wedge (18); The Catch-Up (20); Today Tonight (27 votes).

Most overhyped program: Prison Break (3); The Chaser's War on Everything (14); Heroes (17); Ugly Betty (30); Big Brother (65 votes).

Most underrated program: Iron Chef (2); RocKwiz (3); Family Guy (8); Crossing Jordan (8); Shameless (12); Veronica Mars (19); Spooks (20); Extras (27); Boston Legal (28 votes).

Most jerked around by the networks: Charmed (2); The Amazing Race (3); The Shield (3); Battlestar Galactica (4); Gilmore Girls (6); Nip/Tuck (10); Stargate (10); Six Feet Under (13); The West Wing (19); The Sopranos (24); Scrubs (27 votes).

Furthest past use-by date: Australia's Funniest Home Videos (2 votes); Big Brother (3); The Bill (3); Ray Martin (3); McLeod's Daughters (10); Daryl Somers (21); all members and former friends of the Corby family (25); Bert Newton (44) ("He's more machine than man now," said one voter).

Most unnecessary TV personality: Brigitte Duclos (5); David Koch (6); Karl Stefanovic (15); Andrew G (16); Lara Bingle (19); Hotdogs (21); Richard Wilkins (39 votes).

Best Botox: Sam Newman (1); Naomi Robson (3); Sigrid Thornton (10); Tracy Grimshaw (34); Gretel Killeen (52 votes).

Worst network: Foxtel (2); SBS (3); Ten (30); Seven (36); Nine (60 votes).

The Black Bogie: Bert Newton (15); Naomi Robson (16); Eddie McGuire (63 votes).

We welcome your analysis.

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. For further observations of Australian attitudes and behaviour, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

• in The Tribal Mind at 12:00 AM
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The ratings race: week 18

This blog is now a heritage item -- worth studying but no longer current. To join the latest discussion on media and popular culture, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.
What Australia watched, Saturday
Plus football watched only by certain cities
1 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,292,000 332,000 355,000 250,000 159,000 197,000
2 SPIDERMAN 2 Nine 1,100,000 280,000 357,000 209,000 130,000 125,000
3 AUSTRALIA'S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEO SHOW Nine 1,065,000 286,000 334,000 203,000 124,000 118,000
4 NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,058,000 298,000 308,000 217,000 137,000 98,000
5 GREAT COMEDY CLASSICS Seven 998,000 278,000 294,000 163,000 109,000 155,000
6 THE GREAT OUTDOORS Seven 870,000 221,000 286,000 174,000 76,000 113,000
7 PRIMEVAL Nine 848,000 234,000 244,000 204,000 84,000 82,000
9 SATURDAY NIGHT AFL Ten 801,000 122,000 335,000 60,000 148,000 136,000
10 The BILL for Daniel ABC 728,000 242,000 230,000 116,000 52,000 88,000
17 SATURDAY AFTERNOON AFL Ten 552,000 77,000 233,000 71,000 71,000 101,000
20 BEFORE THE GAME Ten 498,000 18,000 334,000 10,000 58,000 78,000
25 SPORTS TONIGHT SAT Ten 320,000 113,000 136,000 71,000
27 IRON CHEF SBS 282,000 71,000 89,000 33,000 38,000 52,000
34 ROCKWIZ SBS 238,000 68,000 81,000 37,000 25,000 28,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

What Australia watched, Friday
Plus football watched only by certain cities
Description STN Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,341,000 355,000 359,000 245,000 158,000 225,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,198,000 303,000 301,000 235,000 149,000 209,000
3 BIG BROTHER - FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE Ten 1,169,000 298,000 387,000 193,000 146,000 145,000
4 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,162,000 366,000 357,000 157,000 129,000 154,000
5 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,090,000 314,000 360,000 204,000 113,000 99,000
6 NINE NEWS Nine 1,085,000 344,000 311,000 204,000 135,000 91,000
7 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,032,000 307,000 263,000 204,000 107,000 151,000
8 TEMPTATION Nine 1,031,000 300,000 334,000 175,000 104,000 119,000
9 ABC NEWS ABC 1,003,000 249,000 354,000 159,000 116,000 124,000
10 BIG BROTHER Ten 939,000 259,000 289,000 161,000 117,000 113,000
19 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 6: ST. KILDA V CARLTON Seven 720,000 S24,000 M421,000 B34,000 A128,000 P113,000
20 PUSSYCAT DOLLS PRESENT: THE SEARCH FOR THE NEXT DOLL Ten 718,000 193,000 218,000 124,000 103,000 80,000
21 NINE'S LIVE FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 662,000 S411,000 B251,000
24 NINE'S FRIDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL Nine 483,000 S343,000 B140,000

What Australia watched, Thursday
1. Seven News Seven 1.393
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.317
3. Home and Away Seven 1.196
4. My Name Is Earl Seven 1.178
5. Nine News Nine 1.178
6. Getaway Nine 1.142
7. A Current Affair Nine 1.128
8. Lost Seven 1.116
9. Law and Order: SVU Ten 1.096
10. How I Met Your Mother Seven 1.079
11. Law and Order: Criminal Intent Ten 1.077
12. Temptation Nine 1.024
13. ABC News ABC 0.958
14. Big Brother Ten 0.881
15. The 7:30 Report ABC 0.869

What Australia watched, Wednesday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,572,000 425,000 377,000 308,000 212,000 251,000
2 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,469,000 383,000 380,000 291,000 189,000 226,000
3 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING ABC 1,363,000 419,000 370,000 217,000 145,000 211,000
4 SPICKS AND SPECKS ABC 1,352,000 409,000 385,000 232,000 144,000 182,000
5 MCLEOD'S DAUGHTERS Nine 1,242,000 322,000 377,000 225,000 169,000 149,000
6 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,231,000 301,000 417,000 246,000 146,000 121,000
7 NINE NEWS Nine 1,229,000 318,000 403,000 265,000 143,000 99,000
8 BIG BROTHER - WILD CARD ENTRY Ten 1,205,000 285,000 376,000 239,000 143,000 163,000
9 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,173,000 315,000 306,000 234,000 132,000 185,000
10 HOUSE RPT Ten 1,168,000 323,000 347,000 213,000 134,000 151,000
11 COLD CASE Nine 1,147,000 330,000 353,000 206,000 114,000 144,000
12 POLICE FILES - UNLOCKED Seven 1,101,000 267,000 361,000 219,000 95,000 158,000
13 HEROES Seven 1,097,000 286,000 333,000 195,000 126,000 157,000
14 THE NEW INVENTORS ABC 1,071,000 318,000 326,000 172,000 89,000 166,000
15 ABC NEWS ABC 1,056,000 264,000 323,000 185,000 104,000 181,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

What Australia watched, Tuesday
1 DANCING WITH THE STARS GRAND FINAL Seven 2,199,000 (to see how this fits into the most watched programs of all time, click here)
2 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,560,000
3 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,522,000
4 CROSSING JORDAN Seven 1,295,000
5 NINE NEWS Nine 1,255,000
6 HOME AND AWAY Seven 1,238,000
7 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,203,000
8 TEMPTATION Nine 1,140,000
9 BIG BROTHER Ten 1,119,000
10 ABC NEWS ABC 1,106,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

We've been deluged with more nominations by readers for The Bogies (a new way of celebrating excellence in Australian television, devised by alert reader Grant James). Voting closes at 6pm today, with winners announced tomorrow. Here's the expanded list:

THE BOGIES. And the nominees are ...
Most embarrassing program of the past 12 months: The ads on SBS, 9am With David and Kim, Celebrity Pet School, Quizmania, The Catch-Up, ABBAmania, The Wedge, The Con Test, Cheaters, Today Tonight, A Current Affair.
Most overhyped program: Lost, Prison Break, Heroes, Ugly Betty, Big Brother, The Chaser's War on Everything.
Most underrated program: RocKwiz, Iron Chef, 24, Family Guy, Extras, Shameless, Crossing Jordan, Boston Legal, Veronica Mars, Spooks.
Most jerked around by the networks: Alias, The Amazing Race, The Shield, The Office, Battlestar Galactica, The Sopranos, The West Wing, Gilmore Girls, Fear Factor, Scrubs, Six Feet Under, Nip/Tuck, Stargate.
Furthest past use-by date: Big Brother, The Bill, Australia's Funniest Home Videos, Kerri-Anne Kennerley, Bert Newton, McLeod's Daughters, Daryl Somers, Ray Martin, all members and former friends of the Corby family.
Most unnecessary TV personality: Brigitte Duclos, David Reyne, David Koch, Richard Wilkins, Andrew G, Hotdogs, Karl Stefanovic, Lara Bingle.
Best botox: Sam Newman, Sigrid Thornton, Gretel Killeen, Tracy Grimshaw.
Worst network: Foxtel, SBS, Seven, Nine, Ten.
The Black Bogie: Eddie McGuire, Bert Newton, Naomi Robson.

Register your vote here ...

What Australia watched, Monday
1. Seven News Seven 1.674
2. Today Tonight Seven 1.591
3. Home and Away Seven 1.327
4. Desperate Housewives Seven 1.298
5. Big Brother - 7:30pm Ten 1.277
6. Nine News Nine 1.275
7. 1 vs 100 Nine 1.262
8. The Rich List Seven 1.218
9. A Current Affair Nine 1.209
10. Big Brother - 7:00pm Ten 1.163
11. CSI: NY Nine 1.100
12. Temptation Nine 1.098
13. ABC News ABC 1.098
14. Deal or No Deal Seven 1.028
15. Brothers & Sisters Seven 1.010m
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)
What Australia watched, Sunday
Description Network Sydney Melbourne Brisbane Adelaide Perth
1 60 MINUTES Nine 1,679,000 470,000 560,000 291,000 148,000 209,000
2 CSI Nine 1,641,000 412,000 566,000 253,000 188,000 223,000
3 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,614,000 328,000 430,000 300,000 226,000 330,000
4 AUSTRALIA'S GOT TALENT Seven 1,601,000 378,000 526,000 269,000 193,000 234,000
5 NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,589,000 523,000 513,000 262,000 176,000 114,000
6 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,442,000 414,000 471,000 261,000 137,000 157,000
7 CSI: MIAMI Nine 1,423,000 393,000 466,000 220,000 164,000 180,000
8 BIG BROTHER - FULL HOUSE Ten 1,402,000 337,000 442,000 288,000 164,000 172,000
9 20 TO 1 Nine 1,376,000 421,000 404,000 267,000 131,000 153,000
10 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,359,000 376,000 417,000 216,000 182,000 169,000
11 BIG BROTHER SUN Ten 1,166,000 312,000 348,000 244,000 126,000 136,000
12 ROBIN HOOD-EV ABC 1,046,000 270,000 315,000 196,000 98,000 168,000
16 ROVE Ten 876,000 217,000 274,000 161,000 122,000 102,000
28 NINE'S SUNDAY FOOTBALL Nine 471,000 261,000 190,000 20,000
29 ICC WORLD CUP CRICKET 2007 - FINAL SESSION 2 Nine 457,000 133,000 141,000 80,000 47,000 57,000
30 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 5: FREMANTLE V ADELAIDE Seven 453,000 222,000 230,000
35 SEVEN'S AFL: RND 5: GEELONG V KANGAROOS Seven 411,000 67,000 265,000 63,000 16,000
37 GILMORE GIRLS Nine 349,000 90,000 129,000 62,000 35,000 32,000
39 ICC WORLD CUP CRICKET 2007 - FINAL SESSION 1 Nine 322,000 88,000 153,000 38,000 43,000
(OzTAM preliminary estimates, mainland capitals)

Updated 4pm Sunday April 29
It should have been The One Week Of The Year for Channel Ten. The combination of a Biggest Loser finale and a Big Brother launch was supposed to give Ten the biggest audience share of all the networks. But in the end, it couldn't even come second.

Channel Seven emerged the winner, just as it has done every other week of the ratings year, with 27.4 per cent of the prime time audience. With no special programming, Nine managed 26.6 per cent, while Ten ended up with 23.7 per cent, the ABC got 16.4 and SBS got 5.8.

What went wrong? The ABC's Wednesday lineup of Spicks and Specks and The Chaser's War On Everything beat Ten's House, and Big Brother is performing well below expectations. Time for another spate of stories proclaiming "the end of Reality as we know it''.

What Australia watched, week ending April 28
1 THE BIGGEST LOSER - FINALE Ten 2,023,000
2 DANCING WITH THE STARS 6 Seven 1,899,000
3 60 MINUTES Nine 1,617,000
4 BIG BROTHER - OPENING NIGHT Ten 1,548,000
5 NATIONAL NINE NEWS SUNDAY Nine 1,513,000
6 ALL SAINTS Seven 1,496,000
7 SEVEN NEWS - SUN Seven 1,493,000
8 SEVEN NEWS Seven 1,457,000
9 AUSTRALIA'S GOT TALENT Seven 1,408,000
10 TODAY TONIGHT Seven 1,399,000
11 SPICKS AND SPECKS-EV ABC 1,393,000
12 MCLEOD'S DAUGHTERS Nine 1,361,000
13 THE CHASER'S WAR ON EVERYTHING-EV ABC 1,355,000
14 BIG BROTHER - GAME ON Ten 1,341,000
15 SEVEN NEWS - SAT Seven 1,335,000
16 1 VS 100 Nine 1,334,000
17 HOUSE Ten 1,314,000
18 DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES Seven 1,308,000
19 POLICE FILES - UNLOCKED Seven 1,298,000
20 GREY'S ANATOMY Seven 1,293,000
21 COUNTDOWN TO THE BIGGEST LOSER (AUS) Ten 1,284,000
22 A CURRENT AFFAIR Nine 1,275,000
23 NATIONAL NINE NEWS Nine 1,267,000
24 BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS Seven 1,237,000
25 20 TO 1 Nine 1,237,000
26 NATIONAL NINE NEWS SATURDAY Nine 1,220,000
27 COLD CASE Nine 1,202,000
28 UGLY BETTY Seven 1,192,000
29 ANZAC DAY AFL Ten 1,192,000
30 CURTIN-EV ABC 1,189,000
(OzTAM mainland capitals)

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. For further observations of Australian attitudes and behaviour, go to www.smh.com.au/tribalmind.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 10:00 AM
• Comments (314)

Reassessments: Freeze a jolly good fellow

As Burt Bacharach sang: "You see the sky, the sky's in love with you." And Jimi Hendrix politely requested: "Excuse me while I kiss this guy."

Or so it sounds. The music publishers of America have just done a deal with Yahoo.com that will finally allow us to know what our favourite singers have been mumbling about. Accurate authorised versions of song lyrics - as opposed to guesses by semi-deafened fans - are about to be published on a website for the first time.

As Ian Rogers, the general manager of Yahoo Music, told The Guardian: "Finally, a free, legal and definitive way to settle a bet with the guy sitting next to you at the bar who is certain the Ramones' most famous anthem declares: 'I wanna piece of bacon [I wanna be sedated].' It fills a huge gap out there.

"Song lyrics are continually among the top 10 searches performed on major search engines, though the results often [give] consumers a frustrating experience filled with inconsistent and incomplete lyrics, and annoying pop-ups."

Initially, Yahoo's database will include the lyrics of 400,000 songs by 9000 artists, ranging from the Beatles and Bob Dylan to Prince and Beyonce. We'll have to wait a little longer for Peter Garrett.

Who mumbles the most? Nominate your most incomprehensible lyrics.

We welcome your comments.

• in The Tribal Mind at 12:00 AM
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The Tribal Mind: listen to the goal posts shifting

by David Dale
You know what they say about lies and statistics. Last Friday Channel Ten put out a press release boasting that the final episode of The Biggest Loser had been "the year's top rated show in all major demographics".

This column's subject matter is the things Australians do in large numbers, so that claim caught our attention. We sent Ten's publicist a plea for clarification: "By my count, the top shows in the year so far have gone like this: Australian Open tennis men's final (7) 2.44 million; 20/20 Cricket (9) 2.37m; Heroes premiere (7) 2.11m; Ugly Betty premiere (7) 2.03 m; Today Tonight Mercedes Corby allegations (7) 2.02m; The Biggest Loser final (10) 2.02m. Can you explain what you are basing your count on?" (Click here to read the most watched TV programs of all time)

The publicist sent back this reply: "Our top programs are for week 7 up to yesterday, exc Easter (as always, we look at the survey year only). The top programs reflect the average for year to date therefore, Ugly Betty and Heroes premiers are not looked at individually, rather we look at the shows - Ugly Betty and Heroes - as a whole."

So Ten permits itself to exclude the tennis and the cricket because they occurred before week seven, and it excludes the premieres of Heroes and Ugly Betty and the Mercedes Corby allegations of Today Tonight because they were single episodes. Then it compares the series averages of those programs with a single episode of The Biggest Loser. That's a fabulous statistical analysis even for Channel Ten, already famous for claiming "we won the night" and, when questioned, responding "we meant we were the most watched network with people aged 18-49, which is the only demographic we're interested in" (except when the 16-39s are the only demographic Ten is interested in).

Anytime you read a Channel Ten press release, you can hear the sound of goal posts moving.
But the same shifty sound emanated from Channel Nine on Sunday when it claimed: "Channel Nine Sydney won week 17 of the official OzTam television survey period (Sunday, April 22 Saturday, April 28) securing a 27.8 per cent all-people share, Seven was second with 26.8 per cent and Ten came in third with 22.1 per cent.''

That email arrived as I was typing a report about Seven winning the week with 27.4 per cent of the prime-time audience, with Nine second on 26.6. It turned out that Nine was quoting only the results for Sydney, where it had indeed "won''. But the currency of the industry is the audience across the five mainland state capitals. Nine had suddenly swapped from dollars to guilders.

As the winning station this year, Channel Seven should be above this sort of manipulation, but its summary of Sunday night, released yesterday morning, began:

"Seven scores four of the top 10 programs. Seven News wins. Australia's Got Talent defeats first-run 20 to 1 and Big Brother. Ugly Betty jumps 14 per cent Sunday-on-Sunday (Big Brother dumps 9 per cent). Grey's Anatomy up 12 per cent Sunday-on-Sunday.''

All this is perfectly correct, but rather misses the point, which was that Nine won Sunday night, and the top two shows were 60 Minutes, with 1.7 million viewers, and CSI, with 1.6 million.

In this, the most competitive year of the decade in commercial television, you just don't know who to trust. Unless it's this column.

David Dale is the author of Who We Are -- A snapshot of Australia today (Allen and Unwin). His latest book is Soffritto -- A delicious Ligurian memoir. To join a daily discussion of Australian attitudes, go to http://blogs.sunherald.com.au/whoweare.

• by David Dale in The Tribal Mind at 12:06 PM
• Comments (9)